Common Mistakes to Avoid When Writing an Obituary.

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A guide on common pitfalls in obituary writing and how to avoid them to ensure a respectful tribute.

Person writing at a desk

Introduction: The Importance of a Well-Written Obituary

Writing an obituary for a loved one is a profound responsibility. An obituary serves as a final tribute, honoring the life and legacy of the deceased. It's a lasting record, often published in newspapers or online memorials, that friends, family, and even future generations can reference.

Given the significance of an obituary, it's crucial to approach this task with care and consideration. Avoiding common mistakes can ensure that the obituary accurately reflects the individual's life story and provides a respectful, meaningful tribute.

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Personal details checklist

Mistake 1: Omitting Key Personal Details

An obituary should paint a clear picture of the deceased's life, achievements, and relationships. Omitting essential personal details can leave the tribute feeling incomplete or impersonal.

Be sure to include the full name of the deceased (including any nicknames or middle names), their age at the time of passing, and the date and location of their death. It's also important to mention their place of birth, as well as their parents' names (including the mother's maiden name).

Don't overlook mentioning their spouse or partner, as well as any children, grandchildren, or other close family members. These personal details help contextualize the individual's life and significant relationships.

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Person cross-referencing documents

Mistake 2: Factual Errors and Inconsistencies

Ensuring the accuracy of information in an obituary is paramount. Factual errors or inconsistencies can be disrespectful and potentially cause confusion or distress for grieving loved ones.

Double-check all dates, locations, names, and other critical details with multiple sources if possible. Inconsistencies in spellings, titles, or other information should be resolved before publishing.

It's also essential to verify any statements about the deceased's accomplishments, career highlights, or educational background. Inaccuracies in these areas can undermine the tribute's credibility and integrity.

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Scale showing different tones

Mistake 3: Using Inappropriate Language or Tone

The language and tone used in an obituary should be respectful, thoughtful, and appropriate for a final tribute. Avoid colloquialisms, slang, or overly casual phrasing that could come across as disrespectful or flippant.

Steer clear of insensitive or offensive language, as well as potentially controversial or divisive statements. An obituary should focus on celebrating the individual's life, not stirring up conflict or controversy.

Additionally, be mindful of the tone. While it's appropriate to acknowledge the sadness of the loss, an excessively mournful or melodramatic tone can feel out of place. Strike a balance between honoring the gravity of the situation and maintaining a respectful, dignified tone.

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Timeline with major milestones

Mistake 4: Leaving Out Significant Life Events

An obituary should provide a comprehensive overview of the deceased's life, including their most significant accomplishments, milestones, and experiences. Omitting major life events or achievements can result in an incomplete or underwhelming tribute.

Be sure to include details about their education, career, military service (if applicable), volunteer work, hobbies, and any other notable pursuits or passions. These elements help paint a well-rounded picture of the individual and the impact they had on others.

Additionally, consider mentioning any notable awards, recognitions, or achievements that speak to their character, talents, or contributions to their community or field.

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Person proofreading document

Mistake 5: Failing to Proofread Thoroughly

Proofreading an obituary is essential to ensure accuracy and professionalism. Even a single spelling or grammatical error can be seen as disrespectful and detract from the tribute's quality.

Carefully review the entire obituary multiple times, checking for any typos, inconsistencies, or errors. It can be helpful to have a second set of eyes review the content as well, as it's easy to overlook mistakes when you're too close to the material.

Additionally, verify that all dates, names, locations, and other critical details are consistent and accurate throughout the obituary.

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Mistake 6: Not Including Funeral or Memorial Details

For many, an obituary serves as a critical source of information regarding funeral or memorial services. Failing to include these details can lead to confusion and frustration for those wishing to attend and pay their respects.

Be sure to clearly state the date, time, and location of any scheduled services, as well as any specific instructions or requests regarding flowers, donations, or other arrangements.

If services have already taken place by the time of publication, it's still recommended to include a brief mention of when and where they occurred, for the sake of completeness.

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Photo selection guidelines

Mistake 7: Overlooking Photo Selection

An accompanying photograph can add a personal touch and help readers visualize the individual being honored. However, it's important to choose an appropriate, high-quality image that accurately represents the deceased.

Avoid using outdated, low-resolution, or unflattering photos. Instead, select a clear, recent photograph that captures the individual's essence and spirit.

If possible, include a brief caption or description to provide context for the photo, such as the approximate date it was taken or the occasion it depicts.

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Well-written obituary example

Wrapping Up: Ensuring a Respectful and Meaningful Tribute

Writing an obituary is a solemn responsibility, but avoiding common pitfalls can help ensure a respectful, accurate, and meaningful tribute to a loved one's life.

Remember to include essential personal details, verify facts and information, use appropriate language and tone, highlight significant life events, proofread thoroughly, provide funeral or memorial details, and choose an appropriate accompanying photograph.

By taking the time and care to avoid these common mistakes, you can create an obituary that truly honors the individual's legacy and provides a lasting testament to their life and impact on others.

If you find yourself needing additional guidance or support, don't hesitate to reach out to funeral professionals or online resources for assistance in crafting a respectful and fitting tribute.

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Note: Our content team has not yet finished the review process for this article. It may contain inaccuracies or incomplete information.